Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Swift's "A Modest Proposal" and Ehrenreich's "The Maids"

Hi, class, 
Attached is a link to Jonathan Swift's essay, "A Modest Proposal." Please read the essay and be ready to comment on it. Also, finish reading the Barbara Ehrenreich excerpt ("The Maids") and consider how she ends it.

I will also hand back your responses to Mencken's "The Penalty of Death" and will say a few words about the online responses to Sabin/Goodall.

Please post your own modest proposals (minimum 250 words) in the "Comments" section below--advancing an absurd proposition through various argumentative techniques (appeal to ethics, reason, emotion).  This assignment should be completed by Sunday, 2/13/11. Have fun with it!

All best,

Prof. Williams


  1. Improving America’s Drug Habits

    For many years America has been plagued with its devastating addiction to heavy drugs. As the years pass more citizens are snatched into the devouring market of drugs such as PCP, Heroine, Marijuana and Cocaine. Those who are sober live a life of clear and absolute vision, so they think. When we pass a “cracked out” person on the streets we feel bad for them, we hurt for them, but they don’t hurt for us. They are happy, they feel good, and their endorphins are having a blast. By trying to remove these toxins from the hands of the public America is only hindering herself. The problem is not the drugs, or those who use them, the problem is everyone and everything else.
    Do we take away a baby’s toy? No! The reason being is that the toy makes them happy. Drugs make people happy. We as a nation should not remove what makes people happy; instead, we should share it. This is why I propose that every American start taking drugs from the age of five. These drugs will make us all happy, and a happy nation is the best kind of nation. If everyone is on drugs we will all be the same, because in reality a sober mind has no creativity. The sober mind does not open new doors; it locks the doors that have never been opened.
    Drugs will not only free our minds and souls but, it will also put America in front of other countries. People will no longer be arrested for selling drugs, instead they will be praised for sharing life’s greatest gift to man. America’s economy will be the best it ever was for we would produce drugs and sell it, and by sell it I mean tax it. The divorce rate would also decrease because we will all be so high that the only thing on our minds will be love and happiness. For centuries the word drug has had a negative connotation which is why the name will be changed to bliss. Bliss will be the start of something great, and the end of an old fashioned way of life full of unhappy and bitter people.


  2. The solution to making America a healthy nation

    During the past 20 years there has been a dramatic increase in obesity in the United States. Today over 30 percent of the American population is considered obese. It is estimated that if America does not “change their health habits” the obesity rates will only increase. For the past decade, America has made health education an increasingly priority as schools have tried to enforce healthy habits on children. Television shows have tried to enforce these habits on adults, too. However, as we see from the growing percentage of obesity, this new lifestyle change of educating society is not working! So what do we do now? We need a new approach to decrease obesity rates or else more people will get sick and die from the complications of obesity such as heart disease, stroke, diabetes and cancer.
    The reason why one becomes obese is not one’s fault. Obesity is the result of our ancestor’s eating and exercise habits. In the previous generations, human kind was very active and ate a very different diet than what we eat now. This resulted in a generation whose bodies became adapted to this lifestyle and over the years these traits were passed down. So, in other words, people are obese now-a-days because our generation has bodies that are adapted to natural foods and not processed foods. These processed foods are not bad for us, but unfortunately, our bodies are not yet adapted to them. Therefore the solution to our dilemma is to adapt our bodies to these kinds of foods.
    Let us go back to Charles Darwin’s theory of natural selection. Natural selection is the process by which traits become more or less common in a population due to consistent effects upon the survival or reproduction of their bearers. It is a key mechanism of evolution. Now you might be wondering “how does this relate to lowering obesity rates?” I will answer this right away! If we train our bodies to eat whatever we desire, and train our bodies to be sedentary then our bodies will become immune to these habits, and over the years our bodies will adapt to these “unhealthy” habits. This adaption would result in our bodies acquiring permanent traits that would allow us to eat what we want and not exercise while still keeping our bodies in healthy shape! This is where natural selection comes in where these traits would be passed down to our children and to their children and so on. The result: A healthy and skinny nation forever!
    We must begin by giving newborns soda to drink so that their bodies are readily adapted to it. When these babies begin to eat, we should only feed them processed foods. Eventually, these babies would grow into children whose bodies only know processed foods and will only function under the consumption of processed foods. These children will grow up into healthy adults whose bodies are resistant to any kinds of food and resistant to body fat build up. This would be an everlasting cycle of health for America and eventually the human species will have no obesity problems whatsoever! So please my reader, go ahead and enjoy yourself with a nice cup of soda and a juicy hamburger if you want to be the healthiest you can be!

    Your health expert,
    Renata Martin

    One of the most unflattering statistics plaguing the united states and thus the world as a whole is the number of people especially children under the age of 18 kidnapped every year. In a single year, statistics show that 797,500 children under the age of 18 were reported missing with an average of 2,185 children going missing every day. These numbers keep surging every year and most of these kidnapping are stereotypical kidnapping were a child is held in exchange for a ransom. Various plans and programs have been put in place in order to help curb this trend, yet none of these actions have yielded any significant results. After careful analysis, self-provoked thinking and consultation, I have come up with an answer that will not only minimize but totally eradicate this ungodly pattern. My plan is simple; surgically plant a tracking device on the brains of every child and every baby born. This way every child kidnapped can be tracked within seconds of being kidnapped and returned safely to their various families. This plan is the perfect action against kidnapping as most kidnapping are done for money, the kidnappers would have no other option than to keep the child alive and that gives the law enforcement enough time to track down the child because the kidnappers would not want to take any risk of trying to remove the tracking device. Furthermore, if the child was kidnapped for any other reason, the tracking device would give the police enough time and a lead to help with their investigation and search instead of sitting around playing dummies while hoping for a source or lead. This would in the long run help reduce the level of crime since the future generation will be traceable; therefore should any of the children with tracking devices implanted commit a crime, they can be tracked easily. If anybody thinks that this idea is morally unjust and evil, I will ask them to put themselves in the shoes of parents who have lost their children and the children who have been separated from their families and tell me how it feels. After all, all the other ideas haven’t worked so why not give this one a shot.
    the most innovative guy on the block
    William Ansah

  4. During times of economic hardship, it is not only natural, but healthy to relocate the blame. No, it wasn’t Wall Street’s fault. How dare you even mention it! Oh, heaven’s no, it wasn’t the government! It’s all the illegal immigrants taking our jobs. These Mexicans can just walk into the country get employed for less, rendering the good, god-fearing American jobless. To this, I strongly object. So infuriated have I become that I’ve thought of a simple, dynamic way to deter the unlawful trespassing into our blessed country. This method would solve many of the problems that affect our national wellbeing.
    It is no secret that our nation, and especially the southern states, has a high affinity to guns. And why wouldn’t they, right? It is in the Bill of Rights, which is basically God-given. This affinity often turns into school, or workplace-shootings. Whenever something like that happens, liberal pundits always incorporate it to their talking points to push the communist agenda. These shootings aren’t due to a lack of gun regulation. They only happen because Americans aren’t given an adequate time and place to utilize them. That is, until now.
    I propose that we convert these lands bordering Mexico into Shooting Zones. I know of many Americans who would feel much safer knowing that our military has a proper training before going into combat. There’s honestly, no better training that this. Imagine, if you could, our soldiers-to-be shooting at live, moving targets. Being able to shoot at these brown people would provide a plethora of on-field experience as they are colored similarly as to our Middle Eastern foes. After this plan is implemented, you can consider the War on Terror over! And, why only limit this favorable experience to our loved military? There’s no reason. We can open this activity to amateurs as well: Boy Scouts, families on a weekend getaway, church congregations, and so on. Resorts can be opened, entry-fees can be charged... So many ways to profit!
    Before this program gets the attention from the Mexicans, they will unknowingly try to penetrate the country en mass, leaving our sacred land disparate with dead bodies. To this, I propose another simple solution. Our bodies cannot keep up with the American lifestyle, and our health problems are ever-increasing. A rational solution stems from this that would slay our worries. After the Mexicans have been terminated, we can swiftly recover their bodies to be utilized for transplants for the tax-payer in need of a clean heart, kidney, lung, etc.
    Now, I do not propose a fool-proof plan here. I only promised deterrence. I’m sure that many a Mexican will still be able to cross, as their pigmentation assimilates to the arid background making them harder to catch. This method will at least ensure that only the best Mexicans will enter our country. This solution warms my heart at the prospect of the future.

    -Nico Carmona

  5. Banning Social Networking

    Contemporary society is widely “enjoying” the many technological advances. It is more than common now to see people with smartphones like blackberries, iPhones, iPods and iPads in their hands. These electronic devices allow people to spend several hours of their days navigating on the internet and mostly in social networking websites like facebook, twitter, flicker and others.
    The widespread use of this high tech devices and websites has become addictive to a big segment of the population causing a negative and profound impact in their lives. This addiction is stopping society to be more productive and also it limits people interaction. People cannot concentrate at work or in the classroom because they are constantly distracted by these networking pages. This distraction in the work place causes a waste of money for employers because they are paying salaries to people who do not work as productive as they are expected to be.
    Social networking also has a negative effect in family relationships. People spend too much time connected to these webpages that there is no time left in their daily lives to enjoy some quality family time. Parents and children instead of doing sports, going to a museum or simply enjoying nature, they spend their precious time surfing the web. Furthermore the excessive use of internet and social networking is creating antisocial citizens who lack public and personal skills. There are several persons who are socially active online, updating status, commenting pictures, writing blogs on facebook or twitter for example. However, these same people do not act as open as they do while online because they lack communication skills when they are on a face to face situation.
    My modest proposal to stop this addiction and dependence is to make the use of internet based social networking illegal. Anyone who gets caught using a social networking media should be fined with $10.000. Furthermore, any high tech creator who launches a new networking site should be fine with $10’000.000 for creating a threat to society and interrupting the calm and peaceful life of individuals. These actions will force people to use their time to focus their attention on important matters of their lives. In addition, my proposal will allow people to spend more time with their loved ones instead of wasting their time in front of a computer or high tech device.

    Carla Alvarez

  6. The innate act, which makes your life and mine possible has been tainted by the lesbian, bisexual, and transgender population, but mainly the gays. They have mastered the act of spreading deadly diseases across each corner of the world like wildfire. Today, AIDS claims the lives of the perpetrators, which they rightfully deserve, in addition to the lives of innocent children, who are product of unnatural behavior. Their sexual tendencies have instilled fear in STD-free individuals, given the act of making love a negative connotation, infected heterosexual couples, and expedited the end of our human race. Enough is enough, I say!
    Drastic measures must be taken to ensure God’s word is not defied by these unmoral beings. The Bible demonizes homosexual acts and for good reason; their actions have placed a burden on the rest of society. Their attempt to challenge the Church and the intrinsic nature of biology has come to an end, for their bodies have responded to their unorthodox acts by self-creating a virus that targets the gay population.
    Trust among heterosexual couples has seized to exist. The virus has somehow infiltrated the heterosexual community. Fear has taken hold of their minds and their preoccupation over the virus has affected their sex life. Who will create babies? The gays? They have mocked Christian values and ridiculed society as a whole by continuing their efforts to spread the virus. Ever since safer sex became a prevalent practice, homosexuals have found a way to cheat the virus. Well, not anymore!
    As more of them enter STD-testing centers everyday to make sure their promiscuous lifestyles have not endangered their lives, we can take this as an opportunity to arrest them, hold them captive, and ship them off to a remote location where they can live with HIV/AIDS infected sinners. That my brothers and sisters is my proposal. Together we can pray to the Lord and hope that He puts a halt to these relentless homosexuals.

    Rodrigo Perez

  7. Many believe that in order to live comfortably and be able to provide for one’s family in the upcoming years, one will first need to at least obtain a bachelor’s or master’s degree. Because of this, there has been a massive influx of college attendees and graduates across the United States throughout the past decade. Popular majors for these students have varied from pre-medicine to pre-law, leaving these students with major loans to pay back. This is a great dilemma which can be avoided in various ways.
    A very reliable coworker has recently informed me that the quarterback, Matt Hasselbeck of the Seattle Seahawks, makes an annual salary of $19,005,280. After realizing my shock and amazement to this fact, Anonymous told me that in 2006, the quarterback Michael Vick, received an annual salary of $23.1 million. Research shows that the average salary of a surgeon with about 9 years of experience is less then 1% of the income of either of these two pro-athletes. You do the math.
    Instead of having to endure countless sleepless nights, lack of having a social life and great lump sums of loans to pay back in the future, we need to educate American children to become more athletically competitive. There are way too many educational television shows and channels, and too few channels to watch sports. Shows such as ‘The Doctors,’ and networks such as Discovery Channel, need to be removed in order to provide viewers with more Entertainment Sports Programming Networks, because having approximately 4 different ESPN channels is surely not enough. Also, instead of educating our children to always get some studying done every night, we need to encourage them to practice their sports faithfully. Young boys especially need to dedicate more time to playing football than trying to understand English Language and Literature. Too many students are focused on grades and getting tutors to improve their academic grades then on their abilities to play sports and getting personal trainers. We need to look at the bigger picture my friends, would you rather work hard at school now and enjoy life comfortably later? Or, would you rather play now (sports wise) and play more later (in terms of enjoying life)? The choice is yours to make.

    Sherley Demetrius

  8. Our country is becoming severely burdened by the increasing demand on social programs by unemployed wage-labourers. In Kentucky, approximately five hundred thousand dollars have been issued to assist wage-labourers in the manufacturing sectors who suddenly find themselves without employment.It seems to be much easier for these slothful labourers to rely on the initiatives of others than to employ measures that would make them more successful candidates for employment.
    We can all agree that the main aim of wage-labour is to satisfy the basic human needs of food, shelter, and clothing; anything else should be reserved for the wealthy. The idea of working for financial compensation is an overrated aspect of the ingenious capitalist regime, because income earned is sometimes recycled back into the same companies from which it was garnered, through consumerism. This ingenuity deserves a standing ovation. Wage-labourers are not likely to experience personal growth because of their preoccupation with their ever fleeting capacity to afford the bare necessities of life. If only they could be relieved of this burdensome obligation.
    So it is after intense deliberation on this issue that my proposed solution to the enormous surplus of unused wage-labourers is reinstating the very cost-effective institution of slavery. Admittedly, slavery has had a very dark history of physical abuse on its subjects; but I urge you to not allow this minor set-back to be the main reason for refuting my proposal, because at the root of every great achievement are numerous failures. Slavery provided billions of hours of free labour, which resulted in trillions of dollars in profits that aided the United States during the infantile periods of the Industrial Revolution. Like slaves, wage-labourers can finally be relieved of their ongoing struggle to provide the bare necessities, as this will officially be the sole responsibility of their masters. Who can resist such an excellent offer?
    Now there are some who may find this reversion to an outdated regime an insult to the populace, even though we are currently one step removed from slavery. They may propose preposterous suggestions like investing more in educational and training programs geared towards vocational skills; increasing the minimum wage; regulating union bargaining practices on wages and fringe benefits that may increase business cost; implementing early retirement age, and other policies that affect the labour market by reducing the supply of labour.
    Why waste our country’s resources on policies that may prove to be more of a cost than a benefit to our already struggling Fortune 500 companies? Let us do away with the fruitless wage-labour regime, so that we can ease their strain on large corporations operating in this very economically depressing atmosphere. I submit this proposal with the best interest of our country’s wage-labourers at heart, especially during these very challenging economic times. This is more a humane alternative to the sweatshops system of China and India, in my very humble opinion.

    Natalee Smith
    Philanthropist and Scholar

  9. Global Warming
    During the past weeks the United States faced a dramatic change in the weather. Continuous storms have caused for many states to be covered in snow or other types of precipitation. This dramatic change in weather has not only affected the United States but also many nations whose weather continues to change dramatically. Many people blame global warming as the cause for the current weather situation. Studies suggest that if people continue to pollute the earth by careless use of earth natural resources and carbon dioxide emissions, among others the world could be facing another ice age or worse. According to “burning one gallon of gas creates 20 pounds of carbon dioxide,” this quantity multiplied by the millions of cars in the world creates thousands of tons of carbon dioxide. Then, you add the amount released by factories and the quantity becomes unimaginable. This puts up the questions: Years from now will we have an earth that we can live in?
    In order to combat global warming and its effects many programs have been put in place. Many public offices and businesses have committed to recycling programs. Additionally, there is not a day that goes by that you do not hear about a green initiative taking place. But it seems that our efforts are still short as our current weather change tells us. How may you ask shall we combat global warming? Simply, I humbly propose that we train our children and everyone else to breathe carbon dioxide along with oxygen. If as human beings we learn to live on carbon dioxide then the possibility of polluted earth due will be extinguished giving humans the chance to have habitable earth.
    How may this process work? Simple, from the moment a child is born he/she would be put on a treatment where his body is trained to survive on carbon dioxide. Afterwards, the child will continue this treatment until he or she adapts to breathing carbon dioxide and oxygen. The adaptation of new breathing patterns would change the composition of the child’s genes which would be passed down to continuing generations as an emergent property. The new emergent properties would allow for everyone to breathe carbon dioxide and oxygen which would prompt everyone to breathe the carbon dioxide emitted from cars and companies. However, for those who have already adapted to breathing oxygen only, the treatment would be more aggressive in order to force the body to change quickly. A decrease in carbon dioxide level would mean an increase of a cleaner earth. Imagine, being able to travel in your car and not care about destroying your environment. Doesn’t that sound appetizing and guilt free?
    Your humble servant

    Cinthya Dominguez

  10. With a new, illegal president ruling America, it is only natural that nationalist sentiment would start increasing in America. As the freest and best country in the world, it is imperative that America guards her national treasures from the grubby and lazy hands of the poor of all the other countries in the world. I have a simple proposal for dealing with them.

    America must, like a roaring eagle, swoop down and consume those who do not work hard to have wings like us; those who chose to be snakes and hyenas instead of us. I do not mean it metaphorically. I believe we Americans should take the most American option available to us so that we may properly exterminate the beasts that are now dropping anchors in our country.

    America must gear its young ones up for newfound eagle raising jobs. We will need breeders and trainers. We will also need to add an Eagle Battalion to Homeland Security so that we may properly deal with the illegal scum in America. We will train the eagles to attack the jugular veins of these people, thus rendering them dead before they can go to our American emergency rooms and get the best healthcare in the world for no cost to them.

    This new initiative would create all kinds of jobs of us good and honest Americans. Firstly, it would create eagle trainer, breeder and battler jobs. Secondly, Americans could easily fill the positions left by the now dead illegal filth. This would kick start the American economy and tax base, allowing America to once again regain the power it had under glorious Reagan.

    Don’t talk to me about immigration reform. Don’t talk to me about reducing American hegemony both financially or politically so that ravished non-American countries can actually prosper. It is all about the market. Some people choose to be born rats. We Americans chose to be born in the right place. We chose America.

  11. In need of a breath of fresh air?

    It is a sad truth to realize that in just the few years that mankind has inhabited this world; we as a species have collectively contributed to unhealthy amounts of pollution to the atmosphere. Put in perspective, this would mean that in the imminent future the air that we now so often take for granted, would be virtually un-breathable. Do not fret. I have come up with a simple and efficient plan to deter from this inevitable doomsday. It begins with persecuting the culprits, many of whom roam the streets of this great planet aimlessly. You may not know it, but many a culprit drive among us.

    Driving came about as direct result to the invention of cars in the late nineteenth century. After this fatal invention, pollution has increased tenfold. What are we to do? Our generation did not choose to fall in the clutches of the car industry’s evil hands, but we have unfortunately fallen. The opportunity is now in the hands of our generation. I propose that we stop the use of all cars immediately. Not only will the health of the inhabitants of the world improve, the “health” of the atmosphere itself will improve also.

    We must return to our ancestral roots. It is time to take the term horse power in a literal sense. Our ancestors survived for years this way—why can’t we? Just imagine how much healthier everyone in the world would be if cars were outlawed? Not only that, but the greenhouse emissions produced by cars would no longer exist. The Worldometers website states that over 600,000,000 cars are currently in use. If cars were banned worldwide, the entire Earth would sigh in relief. Can you see any flaw in my plan? I think not.

    Although you can view this plan from any angle and see no flaws, the radicals will always make an argument where there is no argument to be made. These people would say that the bright minds of the world could eventually create alternate fuel powered vehicles, but I say blasphemy! Why wait years and years for a solution when we can do something about it now? Think about how we can create a perfect chain reaction for the future. If nothing else, think about the children. Do you really want to deprive these poor innocent children of clean air? Good luck explaining to your son and/or daughter that you contributed to their lack of clean, free air.

    Walking tall and breathing right, Yulieth Cordero.

  12. A Solution to Gangs and Delinquency

    Television, newspapers, and all the informative media are overloaded with chaotic news as a result of the crime and delinquency perpetuated by gang—members and ordinary criminals on an everyday basis. Good—nature and timorous people are subject to the terror these criminals impose over the general population. Any law—abiding citizen would agree with the assertive request of eradicating these bad seeds from society. Therefore, I foresee into a brighter future and a better common livelihood for the general people. I say, enough! The burden that this kind of individuals causes in our society is appalling. Every person with a criminal record should be send to boot—camp training in order to be shipped to war zones in foreign lands. This methodology will not only get rid of the perpetrators of crime in this society, but it will serve as a life―changing experience for those incorrigible criminals.

    The benefits of this hand—on proposition are considerable. For instance, in the socio―economic field, the penitentiary system will get rid of many people that are incarcerated. In doing so, the government will be able to redirect the taxes that are destined to support the unproductive community behind bars. Police—men will have more time to patrol the streets, thus the crime rate will be reduced progressively. Many good soldiers’ lives will be spare since only people who have wronged our society will be the victims of the war. This will be a disciplinary and problem—solving approach to crime. Sentenced criminals as a result of being sent to war will become a productive force while serving their country, learning unequivocally the values of life and freedom. Those people who survived the war will be given a second opportunity to reintegrate society, anticipating that the qualities of honor, respect and patriotism had been infused in their characters.

    Capital crimes and misdemeanors will diminish exponentially because nobody would want to be sent away from their friends and families to a strange and dangerous place. Undoubtedly, this plan does not cross the boundaries of cruelty and logic because it has been analyzed thoroughly, after many years of behavioral studies of the criminal mind. Looking forward to a common interest, I submit this proposal to the congress in charge of providing new and visionary ways to solve this never—ending crisis cause by crime and corruption. This country will soon see the results of this new ideology, with reduced crime rate, and a more centered and productive population, our society would become the most efficient in the world.

    Juan Franco Flores

    Gentleman and Scholar

  13. Text messaging is undoubtedly a major technological achievement in today’s society. Along with its many advantages, such as ending relationships via texting, disadvantages also exist. Unfortunately there is an exorbitant amount of deaths caused by texting while driving. Many innocent lives are lost daily because of this lack of judgment made by incompetent drivers. Although responsive measures have been implemented by lawmakers, the death toll has not declined enough make a significant impact. It has been shown that having to pay a monetary fine for an act that can be avoided is not working. Therefore, I humbly propose for lawmakers to employ more laws that will help diminish this unfortunate situation we face. The laws can include, but are not limited to, having all drivers wear thimbles on their texting fingers at all times while operating a vehicle. Furthermore, failure to abide by this law will result in having the criminal should be punished by use of a firing squad. This solution is a good way to quickly decrease and ultimately eliminate these senseless deaths once and for all.

    Bobby Kalpouzos

  14. Marijuana Helping the Nation

    Today, in the 21st century, life has become so complicated;
    there are bills and loans to pay, children to cloth and feed, school
    and work to get to and family and friends that need help. With all of
    this, there seems to be no time to just relax, or there is nothing
    that can relax us. But there is one thing, and that one thing is
    marijuana. I know what you are thinking, “Marijuana is a terrible
    drug. It can only bring harm to the society”, which is not true at
    all. For instance, the Rastifarian Church of Jamaica, smoke marijuana,
    and they seem pretty relax and happy. If this drug can work in
    Jamaica, it can certainly work in American. Smoking marijuana would
    bring the simple or hippy life of the 1960’s back.; where peace
    reigns, and everyone sing Kumbaya around the fire. Also, neighbors
    would enjoy helping one another, the rich would be ecstatic to give
    away their money because they would be too relax to care, and racism,
    sexism, and all other cruel –isms would be cease to exist.
    Not only would marijuana help the American society just stop for a
    moment and relax, but it can also help the environment and the
    economy. Going along with the “green” movement, after the buds of the
    marijuana are all smoked, the stalks can be used to make paper, rope
    and clothing. This will create new jobs which would stimulate the
    economy, and help the government close the deficit. Also, this will
    assist the government to lessen the amount spent on the war on drugs
    since they will the ones supplying the drugs. America will finally
    have a product that can help the world, and not harm it like the
    bullets that the Egyptian government used to shoot the protesters.
    When the deficit is closed, and America is gaining a significant
    amount of surplus, we as a nation can beat China as the number one
    nation giving aid to African nations. If the country can do this,
    China’s economy, and development would be stagnant, the fear of
    Chinese world domination would vanish, and the U.S. would be able to
    have more influence in Africa since we are “helping” them. The United
    States of America would be number one again. And to think this can all
    happen by legalizing and smoking marijuana.

    Ruth Antwi

  15. Let’s make them live.

    There are different diseases in this miserable world, many of which are terminal, while some kill slowly, many do suddenly. Several diseases are secondary to any of fungal, bacterial or viral infections, while some are as a result of the body not being able to meet up with one or more of its responsibilities or malfunctioning of any of the systems. Poverty, the state or condition of having little or no money, goods, or means of support is not in any way different than a disease. People die of hunger as a result of poverty as much as people die of AIDS, malaria and several other diseases.

    As there are ways to keep people with different diseases alive for as long as possible, though some with pains and some with devastating lifestyle, it will also be good to propose that the poor be kept alive by whatever means possible. One of the best ways to achieve this will be to encourage all Americans to give alms to those that depend solely on it. This will surely help in keeping the poor alive, though some will still continue to die slowly as some sick people do.

    Leftover foods in individual homes and eateries can also be organized for the poor to pick up as they pick up garbage in a well planned and organized manner. Burnt houses, abandoned buildings and dilapidated ones will surely provide shelter and life will continue. This will sure keep poverty among the poor and its presence will never be felt by the rich and well off.

    Babatunde Adeboye

  16. It is a desperate situation one finds oneself in when illness strikes and there is no available insurance coverage. It is even a more peculiar situation when one adds to desperation, the country such a predilection occurs in: one of the wealthiest nations on Earth. The uninsured in the United States are in the midst of this controversial position. It has sparked anger and violence in the political discourse and gone further, causing suspicion to creep into the minds of some. For they perceive reasons behind the governmental solution, mandating insurance coverage of workers by businesses, to be one of "socialistic behavior." So, with lives and money at stake, I have pondered this very difficult subject and have arrived at what seems to be the most appropriate solution: instead of subjugating people to buy into insurance policies or bullying a small, possibly struggling business, by mandating them to provide health insurance for workers, I believe that freedom should take precedence, ringing loud and clear for all .In allowing people to practice the freedom endowed by their constitution, one simply allows individuals and companies to make their choices--at any cost to themselves, their families and their country. Here is my brilliant and if I may admit, most rational proposal told through an exemplary story.
    Sasha Obama is a young woman of 27 years. She is recently divorced and has learned, like many statisticians indicate, that when a woman divorces, she indeed suffers more than her spouse. You see, Sasha Obama is not only a divorcee, but also parent of three to beautiful and rambunctious boys. It seems that this newer generation in her family will be all boys. It is a sad affair for Sasha to have lived long enough to produce three of the newest generation.
    She remembers the first time having sexual intercourse without a secret service agent in the assigned bedroom of her and her husband. Now, looking back, she also remembers the feat it was to have pushed and pushed and pushed until her brain exploded with panic: for it believed its spine to have gone through temporary paralysis. This occurred with all three of her pregnancies, now, sitting in a hotel restaurant, she reminisce about the week she went to her weekly gynecologists for her weekly checkup to encounter a surprise. She had developed stage three ovarian cancer.
    Crying her ovaries out, Sasha sat at the restaurant, remembering how she felt knowing that she would never see the rest of the new generation, her sister's and cousin's children. She depairs of ever getting anymore pies or shaved ice from Hawaii and all because she was just one more woman in the history of her family to die of cancer. Sighing, she walked out of her restaurant. When she brings the children home and cooked them a good meal, she decided, she will tell them then of her upcoming death, for Sasha did not believe in health insurance coverage. No, siree, she did not. Although she loved her father, his disastrous "socialistic behavior" in mandating health insurance coverage for the nation had led her to devote her life fighting for her rights and freedom. And now, she will never live long enough to see it through, for she will die. Taking her keys out of her pocketbook, Sasha Obama smiled with sadness in her eyes, but joy in her heart. For she had finally beaten her father and proven her ideals. She will never give into socialistic tendencies, even with the threat of death and its consequences.
    For it is when one is able, even to the death of themselves and their society, to make their own personal decisions that freedom is truly freedom. As Sasha Obama experienced, it is then that it shines brightest for the world to behold. To be capable of having so many choices that consequences such as peril and death are included is true freedom. Anything else becomes enslavement of a people by an inept and obtuse government.

    Kamika Bennett

  17. An Offer of Social Sanity

    It has come to my attention that there has been an uprising problem amongst the masses, particularly the college graduates, that has started to impact society in negative ways. This rude and obnoxious crowd of intellectuals complains to the government about the lack of job opportunity after years and years of studying under a college level institution.

    There have been suggestions to ship off the multitude to serve their country properly, or to subdue them within our comfortable penitentiaries, and as helpful as that would be to clean the streets of these disturbances, sadly it would not solve the problem in the long run. Such an issue would need a permanent solution to solve not only the current issue, but also the annual addition of jobless graduates that would undoubtedly overcrowd our shelters meant for the unfortunate. It was in the midst of reading of my studies that I discovered a worthwhile solution which I present to you as a humble and modest proposal.

    Each year there are approximately 1.5 million people who graduate from college. Around half a million of those graduates will not have jobs waiting for them afterwards. Include 11 million Americans who are currently unemployed, and that result to 11.5 million unemployed Americans with an annual increasing rate of around half a million graduates. I have learned from a very able scholar within the AARP that the approximate age that one should retire from working are between the ages 55-60. Now there are about 147 million people within the workforce of America. Out of this number, about 15 percent of this population is above the age of 54. That leaves us with 22 million elderly workers which should be, based on my hypothesis, ripe for retirement.

    Instead of increasing poverty and crime within the country, as unemployment is sure to develop, I have thought of a solution that will rid us of these rusting workers, and open up fresh jobs for our starving graduates. I propose disposing of these worn out workers and replacing htem with our fresh batches of college students. When an apple tree grows old and loses its usefulness, and you pick it from the ground, and plant in the new apple tree that can bear new taxable apples. As disheartening to the staff of retirement homes as this may seem, one has to view the extreme benefits of putting this population to sleep.

    The hundreds of thousands of living spaces that will be vacated can be filled with new working graduates who would now have a means to pay for their new residence. With the opening of over 20 million jobs nationwide, many unfortunate individuals will have the opportunity to get off the streets, earn a means for living, and have a warm place to go home to.

    As for the large amount of remains leftover from disposing of the previous workers, there is a simple solution. Human ashes have an abundant amount of carbon within them that can be heated to produce graphite which can be synthesized into diamonds. These diamonds can either be given to the families of the deceased workers as payment for their losses, or sold internationally to benefit the economy.

    No longer will there be any more riots from college graduates about a lack of a job or home, and if this becomes an annual act of dusting and doing away with all of America’s decay, it will be a guarantee that America will never have another college graduate without a job and a home to go to.

    Your humble and noble scholar,
    Daniel King III

  18. In Today’s Economic Crisis, customers need Low Prices, customers need Wal-Mart.

    Customers are sometimes infatuated with shipping at Wal-Mart because of the therapeutic benefits that comes from the experience. What greater feeling exist, other than the peace of mind, knowing that you have just landed the lowest price for a desired item? The experience of snatching the sale is the best remedy for any melancholic state of mind. Certainly, shopping at Wal-Mart has the same psychological and physiological benefits that a person would receive from sex, exercise, vocations, or even a career promotion at a major corporation.

    Recently— CNN ran a broadcast about the sensations customers experienced after snatching a big sale. The reports reveal that shoppers who score an extravagant sale have the same thrill one has during an orgasm. Now we perhaps know why loyal Wal-Mart customers are so loyal and enjoy so much the conglomerate's “everyday low prices.”

    Further research by The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services shows that the number of sexual orgasm that is require weekly to promote good health is at least three times per-week. Ian Kerner wrote a column in The Huffington Post entitled “6 Health Benefits of Sex" in which he advocates people should have sex more often. Kerner affirms, “So forget about an apple a day. To feel healthier, look younger, and live longer. An orgasm or two a week may be an effective -- and certainly enjoyable – remedy.” In this case, loyal Wal-Mart customer should certainly shop more often.

    However, the benefits of shopping at Wal-Mart extend way beyond six. Shopping at Wal-Mart has the ability to inspire customers by bolstering their confidence -- giving them the feeling that they can achieve greatness. In addition, this grand experience helps bring warmth and happiness to their loyal hearts—customers who are harmlessly just looking to purchase goods not just at the best quality, but at the lowest pricing—customer who are only looking to ease the tedious process of shopping around for the lowest prices, or the cumbersome ordeal of going to more than one store to get multi-items.

    These are not people. They are just loyal Wal-Mart customers! Loyal Wal-Mart customers do not stop to think about the ripple effects their desire to purchase at the lowest prices has on the country's monetary cash flow, worker’s exploitation, unfair international trading, and child labor. Plus, the burdens of selling at the lowest prices have tremendous effect on other companies as well. One such effect is globalization. Due to the inabilities of companies to keep up with the imperialist Wal-Mart, they resort to cheap labor, which is a side effect of the disease knows has outsourcing.

    Often times than not, due to outsourcing, companies have to transfer their entire business of operation to other countries in order to compete with Wal-Mart’s market power. Outsourcing causes job losses in the U.S.; at a time when Wal-Mart controls the marketplace. But do loyal Wal-Mart customers care? No! People care, loyal Wal-Mart customers are just looking for an orgasmic experience. They are just shopping themselves out of jobs.

    Alton Drummond